Monday, April 14, 2008

What I have learned

We are all well. And the weather is nice outside. Now we are still looking for work. I really thought The Dad would find something quickly. Not the case. There is something I am supposed to be learning now I just need to figure out what it is.

I have some thoughts:
  • I have learned that I need to be more prepared for this job hunting situation. Since we have done this now just about every 2 years. I certainly was more prepared financially this time than any other time, but is just was not enough.
  • I have learned that I am not as spiritually prepared as I would hope. Sunday in between Conference, a program called "Mission or Money" showed on the BYU channel. It was right up there with all those movies you would watch when going to do baptisms for the dead while waiting for the everyone to get changed. The gist of the show was this boy getting ready to go on a mission is offered a job that makes him more money than he has ever made. His original reason for taking the job is to earn more money for his mission so his mother will not have to keep working her part time job. As he gets his money, he buys a truck, starts hanging out with unsavory friends, moves in with them, and has a breakdown of faith. His friend on the other hand is getting ready to leave for his mission and seems to have everything in order. The friend come to the boy and shares his fears of going on a mission and he found he was complacent with his prayers and study. We have all seen or heard a story similar to this I am sure. The thing I got out of it was when the friend is sharing his failings, he says that what helped him the most what not just saying his prayers but getting down on his knees when he said his prayers. We read "every knee shall bend". I have been trying harder to bend my knee in humble prayer.
  • Then I sent my mom an email about all the horrible things that have been happening here and the stress and pain it was causing me. I didn't even want to leave my house. I felt that if I would just stay inside, all would be well. Her counsel was that prayer does not always fix the problem, but it does give comfort. I knelt again and found comfort.

I do not want to be complacent. I want to feel the blessing of my Heavenly Father. I want to be worthy to have those blessing. I have been working with my children so they will have humble hearts and know that Heavenly Father is there for them always. I am still learning.

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